Shit Happens

Well technically before any major shit happens, there's usually a chain of minor shit occurrences that take place for quite some time. The bad thing with this shit minority is that you can't smell them coming. Heck, they're fucking everywhere but you just can't notice them - your sense data simply considers them as negligible.

And when the major shit is about to happen right in front of your shit-struck face, you go like "Oh motherfucker hell no this shit ain't happening." And then it happens. "Oh shit," that's what you usually tell yourself afterwards.

But there's this shit we usually term as supreme.

God, no. Save us.

Supreme Shit: You're dead.

Imagine though that I've been through one and I made it out barely alive. At least I am. And I'm telling you, you're not going to like it.

Haircut

I had one yesterday somewhere in Gateway. Oh yeah, Menage Salon! I remember. Oh well, I had to say good bye to long hair because I have to look decent at Jeimi's debut later.

It's just that, I kept the devil lock. Roll out motherfuckers. Lezzgo!

Oh Shit

That's the title of my Plurk page. Don't you just love saying that out loud especially when something comes up that terribly destroys your day? Oh shit man that sucks big time.

I had a little artsy fartsy itchy blah blah whatever you name it "fight" with mum last night because I went home pissed and fucking broke. And she didn't seem to see my point of why I was hot-headed. So much for understanding parents. I'm sick of being the one who understands people here at home ALL the fucking time. They just can't see that I'm only a human being.

What if I exist not as a human being but something else? Oh shit.

Plan B

Something's cooking. Better watch out. Better not pout.

Contentment

For some reason, I'm feeling this inner drive that propels me to be happy for no reason at all. Well, in actuality, I just realized that no matter what happens, I still have to value what I have - or at least be contented with the life I have.

Furthermore, I feel like doing a lot of school stuff this weekend. I'm kind of focusing my energy to do all the tasks I need to finish. I'm really motivated for no goddamn reason. I just feel happy and revitalized.

So yes, basically I am re-energized with optimism. I now look at the world in a very different perspective. I can see goodness from everything I encounter and I feel like I can make good out of something useless at first. I've never felt this way before.

And oh, love is out of the matter here by the way. I just felt the positive vibes of life by being a very positive person as opposed to what I was before. I am now ready to tackle reality while empowered by my trust on myself.

P.S. Do you know the word 'sarcasm?'

Optimism

Optimism is a real bullshit. But sometimes, it helps you survive... At least for quite a while - as long as reality does not bite hard.

HAHAHAHA

That's what I've been saying to myself lately. It's been days and weeks and months and I still couldn't forgive myself for being the epitome of the word stupidity (and I'm talking about extremes here). I just could not stop hating myself. It's an endlessly daily routine that I wake up with a self-inflicted anger and that I sleep self-immolated to pain.

I'd rather share it with people personally than rant it over here though. But still, it doesn't make me any less stupid than before. Fuck life for being so pointless, no, love for that matter I guess. Or is it really love? Or just a higher hierarchy of stupidity? Whatever goes.

I loathe myself for that.